Somewhere in the Verdant Bartonian Belt, is a cave. In the cave, there is a machine. This machine made a noise, and an image, and moved a certain way. It ate a native beast and grew horns. The machine left the cave and entered the nearest village. It placed itself on platforms and told stories.
It entered the minds of the villagers and controlled their dreams. The health of the village improved and the machine revised its firmware. The cycle continues, in this time stream (and forever). The machine evolves, becomes Total, and travels the land mass, implanting wave packet egg sacks in head stems and shaking hands.
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HANUMAN: THE MONKEY MAN+++wise devotee of Rama craftblood home brew. Lotus stunt drivetime remapping deepthought Chaiguy. ∞∞∞∞∞∞∞Breezy GOODGOD∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞ https://www.facebook.com/TotalUnicorn/ From THE RELAXATION TAPE on Pecan Crazy Records 2015
The Protocorn pharmaceutical trial results for the 500mg dosage Mini-Knee capsule are in! Side effects may include eagle vision, cakey pride, shy grundles, heel pop oldies, taco penis, pipe troll payments, soggy bagfuls, and revelation of the One True Chicken. Sign up now for the incredible Bagel Lasik procedure courtesy of Total Unicorp 2013!
